


For the Sake of Gold

by SongsofPsyche



Series: Midnight Quest (aka The Misadventures of Princess Alisada and the Evil Wizard Swagathor) [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Evil Wizards, F/M, Fili falls in love, Magic, OC, Romantic Comedy, Swagathor - Freeform, Time Travel, this is my attempt at comedy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-09-08 15:29:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8850322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SongsofPsyche/pseuds/SongsofPsyche
Summary: Alisada is forced to time travel 60 years back  to take the one ring from Bilbo. Instead, she falls in love and turns a lot of people into teacups.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my attempt at comedy, please bare with me as I try to tackle this confusing genre. This is a sequel to Midnight Quest, and I highly recommend you read that first or else a lot of things are not going to make sense. Even though this starts off in Rohan, the majority of the story takes place in the Hobbit (that's why I have it tagged as The Hobbit).

Alisada, previous captive princess of the dreaded wizard Lord Swagathor who once ruled the Tower of Terror gazed over her shoulder and smiled at the blue sky and green grass. She was finally free of that evil wizard, she was finally going do some good in this world. She had just saved Lord Aragorn from Saruman, and they (Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Gandalf and two hobbits she didn’t know) were heading towards Rohan to begin their celebration over their victory at Helm’s Deep (even though Alisada hadn't actually been there when they won, she had been busy being a prisoner of Isengard and cleaning the kitchen).   

A quiet, peaceful silence fell over the party as they rode towards Rohan. Alisada was thoroughly exhausted, and she was glad that she was riding along with King Theodan (who was still pink), instead of managing her own horse. The last time she had been near a horse, she had accidentally turned it into a bright pink coffee mug and she did not want to repeat the experience. Her special “gift” of turning people into coffee mugs had been given to her by Lord Swagathor when he had attempted to curse her into oblivion. Instead of killing her though, he had just given her the ability to turn people into coffee mugs. It was quite annoying. The only way to stop it was to wear her magic blocking gloves, which were an awfully bright purple and clashed with everything she wore. When Swagathor had been melted, the powers of her curse had diminished slightly, now it just turned whatever she pointed at a bright shade of pink. She was hoping that it would just fade away and the she wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore. 

They arrived at Rohan by nightfall, and Alisada was once again thoroughly exhausted. She was very grateful to see the wooden castle, and even more grateful to smell the delightful wafts of cooking dinner. When they got inside, she was shown to a private room with a large bed, and a bathroom with a steaming tub. After a long bath, she walked over to the wardrobe, hoping to find some clothes. And to her delight, they were normal, ordinary dresses made with ordinary plain fabric. She felt as though she had never been more excited to see  plain green, brown and blue dresses, with no flashy sequins or clashing embroidery. 

After carefully choosing her dress (she chose a beautifully plain sky blue dress, with long sleeves and a pale grey petticoat), she walked down to where the sounds of the Rohan Feast were coming from. As she entered, she saw Lord Aragorn, speaking with Lady Eowyn and she smiled. It was so great to see Aragorn speaking again! She had really been worried about him.  He seemed to have recovered from his imprisonment in Swagathor's dungeon though, and when he saw he looking at them he held up a hand and waved. 

Theodan, who had returned back to his normal color, then raised a glass. 

"To Rohan!" He said, and they all drank deeply. 

The rest of the party was a blur to Alisada, full of people laughing and being merry. Even the hobbits were having a good time. Finally, when she had had too much to drink, and had eaten too much food, she wobbled back to her room. She closed the door, and turned towards the bed, very excited to lay down. 

But someone was already sitting on her bed. 

That someone was no other than her old Nemesis, Lord Swagathor. 

"What!? Who?!? WHY? I _just_ got rid of you!!!!!" She exclaimed, sending him a glare. 

"Apparently melting me wasn’t permanent! I managed to gather myself together with great ease, for I am a great wizard." Swagathor said with a oily smile. 

"What do you want?" Alisada asked, not caring that she was being rude.  All of a sudden she wished she could still turn people into coffee mugs. 

"I have come to find my princess, for I have a grand evil task that I wish to give her." He said dramatically. 

"No." she said shortly

"What?" 

"No. I'm not your princess anymore, you have to find someone else." She said, crossing her arms and glaring at him. 

"You so are my princess. You have always been my princess and you will always be my princess!" He thundered, making the room flash menacingly. 

"Don’t you want to know what this evil quest is all about?" He asked 

"No." 

"Aggh. I'm going to tell you anyway." 

"Fine." 

"FINE! I have recently acquired information that will help me become one of the greatest evil wizards in all of history. Sixty years ago, a hobbit found a ring in a cave, a ring of great power. Actually, it is THE ring of power. My task for you is to travel back in time, obtain the ring of power from the hobbit and bring it back to me. Understand?" 

"Not really. There are so many things that can wrong with that plan. Like time travel for instance. How are you going to manage that?" 

"I am the great wizard Swagathor! I can do anything I please! You are to go to the past, find the company of Thorin Oakenshield and take the ring from a hobbit named Bilbo Baggins." Swagathor boomed 

Alisada just rolled her eyes. 

"Whatever." 

"I'm going to transport you to the past now---." 

"WHAT? No! Wait----." 

"In 3....." 

"---I didn’t say yes to this----." 

"….2...." 

"--Oh come on, are you really not listening to me---." 

"…..1" 

"Great." 

There was a loud band and a flash of white light. Alisada felt herself spinning the the darkness, and then she landed. Blinking away black spots from her eyes, she saw the most peculiar sight: 

She was on a dark, cold cliff and on the cliff she saw about a dozen wargs leaping and growling at something in the tree. She squinted and realized that the something in the trees were people. Quickly, she approached the nearest one that wasn’t being attacked. 

“EXCUSE ME!!! Hi! Hope I’m not bothering you, but is one of you Bilbo Baggins? I need to talk to him.” She shouted from the ground, looking up at the trees and ignoring the snarling wargs around her. She had already turned one into a coffee cup, so the rest were keeping their distance.  

“If you hadn't noticed, we are a little busy right now. Please come back later!” a voice shouted  

“This really can't wait. I must speak to Bilbo----.”  

Suddenly the trees crashed down on top of each other like dominoes, and Ali winced as one by one they caught on fire.  

“Oh dear.”  

There was quite a lot of chaos after that, involving flaming pine cones, a rather angry white orc and a very determined dwarf. Ali had been rooting for him until he tripped over a branch and literally fell into the white warg’s mouth.  

The Ali’s dress caught on fire, she tripped over a branch as she tried to smother it and as she did so her left glove was ripped from her hand. There was a purple blast of light and suddenly the white orc was not an orc; he was a small pink teacup with pineapple decorations.  

“Oh my, I think the curse  has relapsed, before just turned people pink.” She said to one of the dwarves, and then as if hit in the head by a very heavy branch, she fainted.  

888  


	2. In which Alisada loses her memory and Bilbo learns the value of always being polite

Ali woke to the welcome crackling of a large fire, and she wondered where she was. The last thing she remembered she was on a cliff that was on fire, and someone had been turned into a teacup. She couldn’t remember much after that though. In fact, she couldn’t remember how she had gotten on the burning cliff, or why she had been there in the first place or what her name was. She couldn’t remember anything at all. Her head ached furiously.   

She opened her eyes, she saw a wooden ceiling, and part of a window. Then she heard a grunt to her left and jumped slightly as she realized that she was not alone. Someone was sitting next to her, someone who had bright blonde hair and blue eyes.   

“Who are you? What happened? Wait…..who am I?”  

“I was hoping you would tell me that.” The blonde replied  

She shook her head, she had absolutely no idea.  

“Maybe it would help me if you told me who you were.”  

“I am Fili.” He answered  

“And how did we meet, Fili.” She asked  

“Well, that’s where it gets interesting. We were all on a cliff being chased by the wargs of Gundaband. Azog the Defiler had us cornered, and then you arrived asking for Bilbo Baggins. Things got set on fire, and all of a sudden Azog had been turned into a teacup. That’s when Dwalin knocked you out, and then the eagles came and rescued us. We are at Beorn’s house now.”  

Ali raised her eyebrows at him, “A teacup?”  

“Yes.”  

Something jogged her memory, a dim vision of an orc being turned into a bright pink coffee mug.  

“I think….I think I did that.” She answered, “It seems like something I would do.”  

“You turn people into teacups?” he asked  

“I think so…..I think that’s why I wear these horrid purple gloves.”  

“Oh.”  

“Yeah.”  

They stared at each other, and then Ali started to look around the room, hoping for more memories to resurface.  

“So we were saved by the eagles?” she asked  

“yes, Gandalf summoned them to us.” Fili answered  

“Gandalf…..that name sounds familiar. Do you think I’ve met him before?”  

“I think he would have remembered you.”  

“Good point.”  

They then both heard her stomach grumble.  

“Hungry?” Fili asked  

Ali nodded, “Wait….I think I just remember my name. It starts with an A. Al, I think.”  

“Your name is Al.”  

“Yes, that sounds just about right.”  

“Okay, Al. Let’s get you some food.”  

She made sure that she was dressed properly (she was), and that her gloves were on tight (they were), then she and Fili headed down the stairs and into the main dining room.  

“Al, I would like you to meet the rest of the company. This is Bifur, Bofur, Bomber, my brother Kili, Balin, Dwalin, Dori, Ori and Nori, Oin and Gloin and my uncle, Thorin Oakenshield. Everyone, this is our savior, Al.”  

There was a chorus of “Hello Al.”  

Ali smiled at them, trying to keep all of their names straight.  

Thorin Oakenshield walked up to Ali and extended his hand.  

"Welcome, Al. I am Thorin Oakenshield and welcome to our company. Thank you for saving us, I don’t know where we would be if you hadnt enchanted Azog the defiler."  

Ali smiled shyly at him, "Thank you for taking me in. I don’t suppose any of you know what I was looking for, do you? I was looking for something but I just can't remember what is it." She asked  

"She's having some memory problems." Fili chimed in 

"I don’t recall anything." Oin said 

The others shook their heads, and then Ali sat down to eat with. As she ate she listened to their adventures.  As she was eating, a small being came in, one with quite a lot of hair and very hair feet. Suddenly a vision sprung before her mind's eye of a man dressed in billowing cloak saying "You must find the hobbit Bilbo Baggins and get it from him". She was very sure that this was the hobbit that man was talking about. She stood up. 

"YOU!" She shouted pointing at Bilbo  

"Yes?" He replied  

"You are the one I'm looking for. Bilbo Baggins. I need something from you. Ohhhhhhh what was it?!? What's in your pocket?" She asked, standing up and walking over to Bilbo.  

"There nothing in my pocket, Thorin who is this?" Bilbo asked  

"That's Al."  

"Al?"  

"Yes. She saved us from Azog."  

"Oh yes, I remember her. Al's a man's name, isn't it?" He asked looking at her.    
 

She shrugged, "So?" 

"I'd just thought since you’re a ...you know...you would have a more....delicate name." He suggested 

Ali raised her eyebrows, "Are you insulting-----." 

Suddenly there was a flash of bright purple light, a loud popping noise and a violet teacup landed on the table. 

Ali stared at it, and then at her gloves. 

"Did I do that?" She asked 

They all nodded their heads. 

She inspected her gloves, and realized with dismay that there was a small hole in her right glove, one she had absentmindedly been pointing at Bilbo. 

"Oops." She winced 

“Hey, that wasn’t very nice!” the teacup said  

They all stared at it.  

“Pardon me, what did you say?” Ali asked it  

“Turning me into a teacup, that wasn’t very nice of you.” It said, sounding vaguely like Bilbo.  

“Well, you were being rude.” Ali answered  

“That’s still no excuse, look at me! I’m now a teacup! How can I burglar a mountain  when I am this small? Turn me back at once.”  

Ali stared at the teacup.  

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know how.”  

"Don’t know how? Do you mean I'm stuck like this forever? That's not fair!" It screeched  

"Well, I'm sorry but sometimes life isn't fair. You are just going to have to stay like that until we figure out how to turn you back." She told it.  

As she turned around, there was another bright flash of purple light and a yellow teacup appeared where Thorin Oakenshield used to be.  

"See, that why I need to fix this hole in my glove!" She shouted and pointed (they all ducked).  

"I think it's getting worse!" She said to Fili 

"You think?" He asked, stepping away from her. 

"Okay, everybody who is not a teacup, go stand over there. We are going to sort this out." She commanded, pointing to the living room.   
 

But before anyone could move, they heard movement outside. Ali looked out the window and saw a very tall man with a pointy goatee, wearing billowing black robes, sparkly boots and a tall wizards hat. He carried a staff in his hand.  He pointed the staff at the front door, there was a burst of yellow light and a cloud of acrid smoke. 

"Uh oh. Beorn isn't going to like that." Kili whispered. 

And then they all gasped as a blanket of pure darkness fell over them. 

888  


End file.
